How do I place an order?

Throw your overpriced shit in the cart, type in your card details, and pray we actually process it. If this is too complex, maybe the internet isn’t for you. Try a coloring book

What payment methods do you accept?

Anything that translates to money — credit cards, debit cards, PayPal, Apple Pay. If it buys yachts for billionaires, we take it

When will I get my order?

Soon. Or not. Shipping takes 5-7 business days unless the world implodes. We’re not Amazon Prime — deal with it

Do you ship internationally?

Yeah, we export our disrespect globally. Customs, fees, tariffs — all your problem. Cry to your government, not us

What’s your return policy?

30 days if it’s unworn, unwashed, and still reeks of capitalism. If you sweat in it or got dumped while wearing it, keep it

Can I exchange an item?

Sure, if you can navigate our labyrinth of a customer service. Email us, plead your case, and we might consider it. Or not. Fuck you, pay me

How do I find the right size?

There’s a size chart. Use it or don’t. If you order wrong, congratulations — now you have a goal weight

Do your clothes fit true to size?

Depends. If you live in denial about your body, probably not. Measure yourself or keep crying

How do I care for my clothes?

Wash cold, hang dry. If you shrink it or stain it, congrats — you played yourself

Are your products sustainable?

Yeah, we sustainably profit off your insecurities. Some items are eco-friendly; most are here to fuel your addiction to stuff you don't need